Liam had his 18 month appointment yesterday and I wasn't able to be there. One of the hardest things about being a working mom is that I miss a lot of the daily happenings in his life. Thankfully, I have a husband who's willing to stay home with him. I'm so grateful that one of us is able to stay home with him so we don't have to put him in daycare. But being the parent who goes to work every day is not easy. That said, I wasn't there for his appointment and he had to get five shots. Ouch. But he was such a trooper and only cried when he was pricked with the needle (by pricked, I really mean getting stabbed repeatedly. OK, that might be a bit dramatic, but still). He's a big boy, taller than most two year olds (what was once thought that he'd reach 6'0, has now been upped to 6'4), perfect weight and health, and above average in the smarts department. I'm so proud of that little man. After the doctor, husband took him for a treat at McDonald's (hash brown and go-gurt) and let him play on the jungle gym. As husband was telling me the story last night, tears started streaming down my face. Hearing how he let Liam climb to the top, knowing that once he got to the highest point he would look down and get scared, melted me. Knowing that Liam needs to learn to overcome his fear, even if it's just one step. And knowing he needed to climb down on his own. Husband coaxed Liam and encouraged him, assuring him that Daddy was there but he needed to take that first step down.
"One step at a time, Liam."
So reminiscent of my relationship with God. I too, want to run to the top of the highest mountain, forgetting that I have to come back down. And my Father, allowing me that choice, knowing that I won't want to come down. I'm afraid, scared to fall, for my perspective has changed. I see the full picture, the danger in my choice. But He's there, reminding me that He's beside me, ready to catch me. But I have to take that first step; I have to have faith in Him
Eventually, Liam reached for some rogue food that's probably been there since the Flood and husband squeezed his way up to the top before he swallowed it. I say swallow because he had already thoroughly chewed it to rubbery bits. Super.
I'm so grateful. Grateful for that tiny son who's too big to cradle in my arms. Grateful for a husband who teaches me lessons about my God. And grateful for my Father who loves me enough to let me make mistakes but is there, arms open, to catch me when I fall.
^^^We went to the park this weekend for a picnic and some energy release. We packed up an easy lunch and while I ate I watched Thomas and Liam climb up and down the slides. It was perfect. Sunny and
warm hot and a perfect family date.^^^
^^^it was a rather unfortunate attempt(s) to get up on that swing. And Liam, not quite sure what his Mama is doing, is certainly intrigued. ^^^
^^^Together we enjoyed the soothing lull of the swing. Time stood still and for a second, he was my tiny baby once more.^^^